Obama Clinches! Hot Flash Sufferers Around the Country Saddened, Achy

Delicious Black Man and soon to be Republican Swift Boating Victim Barack H Obama has achieved the requisite # of delegates necessary to make thousands of old ladies and people who didn't go to college so very, very sad. The AP reports.

Yokel-Off 2008: Which Stereo-Typical Group of Hillbillys Will Win?

In another dramatic, potentially pointless "winner-take-all-or-probably-nothing" set of Democratic primaries, America will see just how poorly informed their countrymen are when it comes to the 2nd Amendment, simple economics, and the ability to distinguish colors from numbers.

Indiana on one side, North Carolina on t'other. In the middle? A brandy new huge effing sub-prime related mess. I hope you like shit sandwich, because that's all that's on the menu for ever and ever. And please, don't ask about the soup.